Friday, December 30, 2005

The New Year


So here I am. Up fairly early. I am rapidly approaching my year annivesery of living at home. I have not lived here for 14 years. It has been difficult. And a bit life changing. The mold that my parents cast me in, is not the man that I have grown into. But they don't care, they have me 1/4 of the way crammed back in the mold. But maybe that is just part of my true life anyway. You can't escape home. Nashville has shaped me, if I like it or not.

Can you identify?

Ok, I will not be cynical because my ass could be dead from a high glucose induced coma because I did not have anyone that gave a shit about me. That is dramatic, I know. But after working with homeless kids in NYC, I have a tendency to appreciate my dysfunctional family, because life without a family is something very, very different.


Let's continue with the idea of age.

First. I take my godchildren to see King Kong today. I am aware of they psycho-sexual crap that is in it, and I have friends that are boycotting, but I am doing this for the children and for myself. I want to see how the stuff is addressed. What is the vision? And now the kids are 12, 8 and 9. Man. Time plays tricks on you.

Second. I kissed a boy that is 10 years younger than me on Christmas Eve and I think I have a love jones or a crush on him (not sure which one, but I am leaning toward crush). He is in his early 20's and is from Mexico and has the kind of body I like (thick and round in all the right places and unapologetically so). Muscles are good for eye candy, but it really does not tell someone if they are any good in bed. Give me a nice round bottom and a little bit of a stomach any day. And the way his ass wiggles when he walks . . . sigh.

Third. Another year has passed by. And this is the first one where I can say that I have not achieved what I wanted. I want it to hurry or end. I got about 48 more hours. Then I want to get on with the business of life. I think I have come to a critical point in terms of university, PhD and that profession. It might not be the best place for me, but I am not listening to the warning signs . . . like no money, hard work load, under appreciation of the humanities in this country (most countries), and the fact that one is a starving artist or writer is no longer sexy and exciting . . . especially at this age. . .

So that is that. Have to get ready to work on New Year's Eve. Man. It will be a lot of people at the resturaunt. 200 in 5 hours.

Geeh-wizz Buttman. That's alot of fact sloppy butts!

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